


Falling Down For You

by theweightofmywords



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alpha Harry, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aristocrat Louis, Arranged Marriage, BUT NO CHEATING I WOULD NEVER, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, I promise, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Liam Payne & Louis Tomlinson Friendship, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Mating Bond, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Omega Louis, Press and Tabloids, Royal Harry, Supportive Niall Horan, Supportive Zayn Malik, mentions of hendall, set in vague historical time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-26 14:04:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 14,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22978402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theweightofmywords/pseuds/theweightofmywords
Summary: If there was an alpha that Louis wanted to call his, it would be Harry. But what happens when an arranged marriage, a hungry press, and doubts get in the way?
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Comments: 72
Kudos: 527
Collections: HL Royalty Fic Fest 2019/20





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is slightly different than the prompt, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! Thank you to the mod of this fest, I really appreciate everything! 
> 
> The attempted assault is in chapter three. I'll put asterisks before the scene, if you'd like to skip it. 
> 
> Title is taken from "Walls." 
> 
> Come find me on tumblr @ louisdaffodil.

Louis should have known.

The young omega’s mother, Johannah, the Marchioness of Doncaster, had alerted Louis that they would be entertaining, in her words, “very special guests,” and that he was to be on his best behaviour. Louis was used to the fancy dinners and stuffy afternoon teas, and his etiquette was up to par considering his upbringing as a member of the British peerage, so he thought nothing of his mother’s words. 

He really should have known. 

It was only when he came face to face with the other boy that he realised how very special these guests were. There, in the sitting room, stood the young Prince of Cheshire, first in line to the throne. Beside him were Queen Anne and the Prince Consort Robin. 

Suddenly, it made sense why his mother had his nanny scrub his face ‘til it shone and why he was in his finest outfit. Sunlight streamed in through the long curtains, glinting off the Prince’s eyes.

Green, he thought. He wasn’t sure if he had ever seen such green. His mother coughed quietly, and he suddenly remembered his etiquette. 

“Your Royal Highnesses,” he murmured, as he stood from his bow. 

The Prince said nothing in response, though his eyes seemed to be studying Louis' face. Squirming under the prince's steady gaze, Louis turned towards the Queen and Prince Consort, both of whom smiled warmly at him. 

“It is our pleasure to meet you, Lord Doncaster,” the Queen greeted. “We hope today can be the first of many to come.” 

“Louis,” his mother said. “Please escort Prince Harry to your quarters. You will be called for supper.” 

With one last bow to the Queen and Prince Consort, Louis walked towards the long hallway that led to his quarters. The click of their shoes echoed off the walls. 

“Would you like to see the gardens, Your Highness?” Louis asked, his voice sounding louder than usual. There was something about being alone with the Royal Prince that had his senses alert. The colours seemed brighter, the sounds more vibrant. 

_(Years later, Louis wondered if somehow, his inner omega knew.)_

He stood a few feet away from the alpha prince, who seemed to be studying the painted portraits and landscapes more as a way to avoid any interaction. Louis held his breath as if he was afraid it would fly away. 

_(Even then, the Prince made him feel breathless.)_

“Okay,” the prince answered quietly as he finally turned towards Louis. He brushed his thumb against his bottom lip as he stared at Louis in that same way he studied the paintings. His eyes were solemn, yet kind. “You can call me Harry, you know.” 

Louis smiled hesitantly as he imagined himself casually saying the prince’s name. It went against all fourteen years of his upbringing to do so. But the prince was standing in front of him, his smile gentle. 

“I won’t tattle to my mum,” the prince smiled, as dimples appeared. “I promise.”

Louis bit back a smile, as he shrugged shyly. The part of him that wasn’t the son of a Marquesse and Marchioness- the part of him that was just a normal boy- was struck with how handsome the prince was. 

“Okay,” he said, taking a breath. “Would you like to see the gardens, Harry?” 

Harry grinned. “Very much so, Louis.”


	2. Chapter 2

Louis should’ve known. 

As a child, Louis had looked forward to attending these lavish balls. He dreamed of dressing up and rubbing shoulders with other members of the British Aristocracy. He imagined himself tipsy on champagne, being swept up in the arms of his betrothed Alpha. 

Except now that he was nearly twenty-one years old, Louis wanted to be anywhere but here. He wished he could stay in his quarters, with his books and his pyjamas and his own music playing, rather than some haughty orchestra. Louis knew he was to enter an arranged marriage eventually and that these balls were important in that process. He had known since childhood that it was a possibility, and that if he and his parents played their cards well, he could potentially marry up the ladder. He could end up as a Duke. 

Or even a Prince. 

Since their first meeting, he and the prince had become close friends. Through regular letters, they kept each other informed about their day-to-day lives. Louis liked to tell him about funny things his sisters would do, and Harry would write back about the silly rules he had to follow as a member of the Royal Family. They often would resort to talking about things that normal boys would experience too- bad dates, mean teachers, small squabbles with parents. What Louis cherished most were the days he had visited Louis’ home, those hours shining like beacons throughout his memories. Harry was different than what Louis would have expected a prince to be. He was gentle and curious, often spinning off into conversations that would take Louis across the universe. He was attentive and kind, never making Louis feel like he was beneath him. He listened to Louis as he talked about etiquette school and his dreams of becoming a teacher, of wanting to see the world. He was quirky, his absurd sense of humour causing Louis to roar with laughter. Honestly, Louis thought he was a little weird, with his non-sequiturs and his tendency to speak in metaphors, but he reasoned it was all of his isolation as the most powerful boy in the country. Heavy is the crown, and all that.

A crown that he wanted no part of. 

He knew that this possibility was what he should want. It would open endless doors and give him the life that many others would kill for. But, there was a part of him that wanted to explore the world for himself. To go out on his own and find his purpose, to find love that was real and not the product of an arrangement. 

And sure, he thought about finding love with Harry, but not because he wanted to be his first choice in an arrangement- no, he dreamt of falling in love with Harry the same way they fell into their friendship. Easily and all at once.

He stood at the top of the steps, his hands clammy and ears burning hot. 

He should’ve known. 

“Presenting the Lord of Doncaster, Louis Tomlinson,” the announcer bellowed before nodding to Louis. Louis grinned as he began walking down the steps towards the crowd of alphas, betas, and omegas mingling below. His collar felt itchy against the skin of his neck, and he could feel the sweat pooling on the dip of his spine. The doors to the balconies were open, and the sheer curtains billowed invitingly. He wanted to go outside and gulp in the night air like he was parched.

Louis should have known, when he felt the first beads of sweat form at the nape of his neck. 

“Tomlinson,” a voice called. Louis peered over his shoulder to find his old friend Liam Payne, Lord Wolverhampton. He sighed a breath of relief to find at least one familiar face. They had grown up together and attended the same university, and although Liam tended to run in alpha circles, their friendship maintained that same comfortable and lived-in feeling. 

“Payne,” Louis smiled as he walked towards him. 

“You’re drenched in sweat,” Liam said, brow furrowed in concern. 

“It’s boiling in here! Is it just me? I feel like I’m-” 

The words died on Louis’ lips. He quickly reviewed the past few weeks and months, scouring his brain for a time when he might have forgotten his suppressants. 

He was in heat, and he really should have known. 

“I need to go,” Louis mumbled. 

“I’ll help you,” Liam said, before his eyes widened. “Not like that! But I can help you get home.” 

He placed a hand on Louis’ back to try and guide him through the crowd, but the touch felt out of place. It was all wrong. Louis sidestepped as if he was burned. He had never been with an alpha during his heat, but he knew that when he found the one his omega claimed as his own, their touch would soothe, like the air flowing in from the open balconies. 

He could feel the beads of sweat falling down his face as he walked quickly away from his friend, weaving his way through the crowd. He burst out onto the balcony, gasping and tugging at his shirt collar. 

“Bloody tie, stupid shirt,” he muttered, his fingers shaking. He hadn’t thought about what he would do beyond just getting to the balcony. He only had an hour, maybe two at the most, before he would fall prey to his heat and make a fool of himself in front of the whole Who’s Who of Britain. 

“Louis,” he heard someone say, the sound of their voice distant as voices tended to be when he was in his heat. His vision blurred with helpless tears. He must be further gone than he thought. He shut his eyes and wished he could just disappear.

“Louis,” the voice called again, but this time it sounded clearer. Someone was standing in front of him, slowly reaching for his hands. He opened his eyes only to find green.

“Harry,” he mumbled, stumbling closer to the Prince. He wanted to bury his face in his neck and expose his own, careless and free. His body felt feverish with the surge of blood running through him. 

He wanted to be swept up in the arms of this alpha, like he had always dreamed.

“You’re in heat,” Harry murmured, stepping backwards towards the balcony ledge. His knuckles were white where they gripped the smooth marble, as if he would fall to his death if he let go. “You need to-“

“I trust you,” Louis said, his words sounding slurred. He imagined Harry’s hands on him, gentle and firm, his familiar voice in his ear, murmuring, gasping. Slick ran down his thighs, and he felt mere seconds away from begging Harry. 

Harry’s jaw unclenched, and for a second, Louis thought he might reach for him. He didn’t know what prompted him to say what he said, only that in the moonlight, with the breeze and the distant music and the room full of stuffy royals, Louis didn’t see the Prince standing there. He only saw Harry. 

“I’ll help you find your driver,” Harry said. He began walking towards the doors, his hands firmly clasped behind his back, like invisible shackles keeping him in place. 

The part of Louis that wasn’t gone yet understood. Harry was the Prince of England, the boy who would be king, and Louis was Louis, Lord Doncaster, a member of the peerage, yes, but ultimately, just one of many potential candidates as Harry’s mate. 

They were not mated, nor were they were intended to be. Unmated omegas, especially those of nobility, were to preserve themselves for their alpha, and Harry, though kind and dear to Louis’ heart, was not his alpha. 

He nodded and started walking towards the doors. 

In an effort to appear more composed, he tried his hand at small-talk.

“I didn’t know you’d be here,” he said, his voice shaky.

“I heard you were attending,” Harry replied. Louis stumbled to a stop. “I wanted to see you. It’s been too long.” 

Louis tried very hard to control himself, but he knew that the air probably reeked of his scent. Another wave of slick emerged as the scent of strawberries and sugar, just a hint of honey, rose through the air. He felt lost in his unabashed want for the alpha. 

Harry’s eyes widened on his next breath, his pupils dilating. “You need to go,” he gritted.

Louis could only nod, as he began to back away. He started to speed towards the steps, the other omegas around him backing away and pretending not to notice him foolishly falling into heat in public, while the eyes of every alpha began to darken. 

A hand grabbed his wrist but before he could snatch it away in fear, a feeling of calm radiated through him. He turned his head to see whose hand had touched him, only to find Harry, standing in shock, his hand still wrapped around his wrist.

_(Louis should have known, when they were younger, and Harry had made him laugh amongst the flowers of his garden.)_

“Louis,” his mum called, walking quickly down the steps. She saw Harry’s hand on his arm and faltered. A smile playing at her lips, she called for her son once more.

“Louis, it is time to go,” she announced urgently. 

Harry let go then and stumbled back a few steps. Louis reached his hand out on instinct, longing for his touch again. He was stopped by his mother’s hand on his. 

“Your Highness,” she said, curtsying slightly.

Harry nodded respectfully as he seemed to come out of his stupor. 

“I’ll visit you,” he said, stepping even further away. “I promise.” 

Before Louis could respond, he was being tugged away. 

“Did you forget your suppressants?” His mother asked, her voice a whisper.

“I didn’t think I did,” he said weakly. “I don’t understand, why would I have gone into-“

His voice died again. 

He really, _really_ should have known.

Images of his governess teaching him about mating flash through his mind, her voice clear in his memory: 

_“An omega nearing the age of bonding can experience early-onset heat if they sense their mate nearby.”_

_“... if they sense their mate nearby…”_

__

_“... their mate.”_

__

__

“Mum,” he whimpered, longing to return back to the ballroom, back to his mate. 

“He is not your mate,” his mother said quietly, before grasping his hand and rubbing a soothing thumb across it. “At least, not yet.”

—

Two months, one week, and four days, and Louis still had not heard from Harry. He tried distracting himself with his studies to no avail, his teachers’ voices droning on in the distance of his mind. His heat was one of the worst he ever had. It was as if his omega knew its mate was out there, somewhere, and his absence only added pain unto suffering. 

“I’ll visit you,” Harry had said. 

And yet. 

Louis wondered if other omegas had experienced what he had with Harry. He knew that alphas of royal blood could match with multiple mates, and he wondered if he was just one of many, like a safeguard built into alphas of royal blood to ensure an heir. With caution, he let himself daydream of what it would be like to truly be with Harry. He cared little for the bells and whistles that came with being a member of the Royal Family, no- in his daydreams, it was just the two of them, sunlight on their skin, the sounds of children laughing, barefoot dancing on kitchen floors, toothpaste smiles and soft pillows. 

Louis wondered if Harry wanted that too. 

His 21st birthday was approaching, and with that would come the announcement of his betrothal. His whole life was preparing him for this. He had all the best training on how to be a good omega for his mate, and though he knew his parents would try to procure a good alpha of decent nature, he knew that his life would essentially be given away to some stranger who didn’t really know him. The possibility that the alpha would be kind to him and treat him well was not one that Louis took for granted. 

The thought of being vulnerable at the hands of an alpha terrified him. 

There was Harry, though. Harry with his long-winded letters and earnest jokes, and his smiling eyes as they caught his gaze during society events over the years. Harry had told him once, as they sat beside the fireplace on one of his visits, that he couldn’t wait to be mated and have pups, that he wanted an omega to dote on and care for all the days of his life. Louis had excitedly told him that he wanted the same, and the memory of the fondness in Harry’s smile had stuck with Louis ever since. 

If there was an alpha that Louis wanted to call his, it would be Harry. 

With determination, Louis walked to his desk to start writing a letter. He scrawled the date across the paper and wrote “Dear Harry,” as a gentle smile took over his face. He was about to start his letter in earnest when his eyes fell to newspaper on his desk. 

_Playboy Prince?_  
_Prince Harry Wooing an American Heiress?_

Below the headline was photograph of Harry, arm in arm with an omega that Louis recognised as Kendall Jenner, an American socialite. He collapsed into the chair, the pit in his stomach growing. The confusion of seeing his mate with another omega made his inner wolf howl. 

With tears filling his eyes, he grasped the paper in his hands and crumpled it until it matched how his own heart felt. 

\--

Louis stared blankly at the newspaper as it burned in the fireplace, its headline disappearing in the flames. The photograph of Harry and Kendall on a yacht burned alongside it, and Louis wished he could somehow burn it from his memory. Since he had seen the first headline two weeks ago, Harry had had the gall to reach out to him. When the butler had handed Louis the letter, declaring that it was from the prince, Louis had immediately tossed it into the fire. He wanted no part of Harry’s games. 

It seemed like Harry planned to go against tradition and marry an American heiress anyway. Yes, perhaps Louis thought that Harry was his mate, but to Harry, Louis was just one of many. A week earlier, Louis had ripped to shreds a newspaper article that showed Harry dancing with Kendall at some fancy ball in New York City, his hands gripping her waist closely. He wondered how many others there were that just haven’t been photographed. The thought made him sick, tainting his sweet memories with Harry with bitterness. 

“My Lord, it’s time to get ready for your banquet,” Louis’ valet, Niall, announced. 

Louis sighed. He had nearly forgotten it was his twenty-first birthday. It was tradition for parents of omegas to reveal their betrothed to them before announcing the omega and their future alpha to a room full of family, friends, and other society members. He knew that somewhere in this house was his future alpha, waiting to be introduced to him. He wondered who he would be paired with. His parents seemed to be lighter on their feet lately, their smiles barely concealing their excitement. His mother had held his hands last night, her eyes filled with what Louis could only describe as hope. 

“All of your dreams are on their way, my love,” she had murmured, squeezing his hands between her own. 

His parents seemed so proud of him, their firstborn, and he knew that they too had made great efforts to procure him a good alpha. He decided that, whoever his alpha turned out to be, he would do his best to be happy and do right by his family. 

After walking towards his en suite, he disrobed and stepped into the tub filled with hot water, rose-scented steam rising into the air. His mind wandered as held his nose and sank below the surface of the water. Perhaps Louis’ betrothed was Liam. Louis would be okay to be mated with one of his friends. His heart would not be content with the lack of romantic feelings, but Louis knew that at least he would be safe and cared for. He would at least have a kind alpha.

Not one that flaunted his romantic escapades for all the world to see. 

Louis was still stuck in his head as Niall dressed him, moments later. The valet must have noticed that Louis was lost in his thoughts because he broke the silence. Though Niall was under Louis’ family’s employ, they had developed a close friendship over the years. 

“The day is finally here,” he said. “Are you excited?” 

Louis tried to smile though it felt more like a grimace. “To be honest, mate, no.” 

Niall paused as he settled the vest over Louis’ shoulders. “It is a bit daunting, isn’t it?” 

Louis nodded, sighing a breath of relief for having someone who understands him. “Promise me that if the alpha is old and cruel, you’ll help me run away?” he asked, smiling. 

“I’ll drive the getaway car,” Niall assured him, patting him on the shoulder. 

Louis laughed, though a sense of sadness crept through him, feeling like this moment with his friend marked the end of the chapter. As he walked down the hallway towards the main quarter of the house, he stopped to look in the hallway mirror.

He was dressed in a royal blue suit, a white button-up shirt with lace details peeking over the collar. A single pink camellia was placed in his suit pocket. His hair was curled to fall delicately over his forehead, and his lips were stained a subtle pale red. He wondered if his alpha would think he was beautiful. 

His mind flashed back to a moment in his past, when he and Harry were only seventeen. 

_They had been talking in the garden for hours at that point, his visit seeming to go too quickly as the sun started to set._

_“I think I’d like a garden of my own one day. One where I can take long naps and have picnics with my alpha and my pups,” Louis had said. _

_“You’ll have that one day,” Harry had replied as he smiled softly. “I’ll make sure of it.”_

_"Would you make it a royal decree?” Louis had joked, raising his hands as if holding an imaginary scroll. Imitating Harry, he had announced,“Lord Doncaster shall have a garden.” _

_Harry hid his smile in his collar, nodding his head. “Something like that.” _

_Louis had only blushed and averted his eyes, as he had tried to fight the urge to reach for Harry’s hand. Out of the corner of his eye, he had seen Harry pick a pink camellia from the hedge. _

_“A flower, for you,” Harry had said, falling to one knee. _

_“Thank you, Harry. It’s beautiful,” Louis had blushed. _

_“Beautiful, like you,” Harry had murmured. _

Jealousy seeped into his memory, and Louis wondered if Harry had used that same line on his American girl. He didn’t need flowery words from his future alpha. He had experienced those once, and with a heavy heart, he had realised that they meant little. 

His eyes hardened as they glanced at the camellia in his pocket. With resolve, he turned towards Niall. 

“Here goes nothing,” Louis said. He walked towards the sitting room and opened the door. 

His heart stopped. 

There, beside the fireplace, stood Harry.


	3. Chapter 3

“No,” Louis breathed out. 

“Louis, dear, we have been waiting for you,” his mother greeted him. He swallowed and grimaced a smile.

Shakily, Louis entered the room and bowed to the Queen and Prince Consort, before turning and bowing slightly towards Harry, avoiding his gaze the whole time.

“Your Highnesses,” he mumbled, feeling an ache in his chest. He felt like the world was pulling a trick on him. Here was the alpha who he had dreamt of being with, the very same alpha who had ripped his dreams to shreds as he carelessly displayed his affections for other omegas. And now, he was expected to play the role of dutiful mate, to this alpha who could not respect his betrothed enough to stop himself from being with another omega. He could imagine the headlines now, the inevitable whispers behind his back at events already blaring in his ears. 

Embarrassment crept into his heart, and his inner wolf cried. 

Harry knelt on one knee before him, a twisted reprise of that one tender moment from years ago. Louis finally looked down at him. The crease between his brows was pronounced, as if he could sense Louis’ resistance.

“Louis, I feel like I’ve waited my whole life for this moment,” Harry began. The image of Harry holding Kendall close to him, their hair blowing in the wind, flashed through Louis’ mind. 

“Since we were children, I felt a special connection with you, and I hope that you feel it too,” he continued, as another image of Harry dancing with her floated through Louis’ wandering mind. Louis tried not to glare in the face of Harry’s blatant lies. 

“It would be my greatest privilege to call myself your Alpha,” Harry said, his voice wobbling slightly as he took a small velvet box out of his waistcoat pocket. He opened it to reveal a large sapphire, surrounded by diamonds, set atop a gold band. “Would you please do me the honour and accept my proposal in marriage?”

Louis felt tears spring to his eyes. This was everything he had wanted, and yet, it was nothing like what he thought it would be. Knowing that Harry was probably just reciting rehearsed lines that meant nothing, knowing that this just an arrangement of political convenience and not actual love-- Louis let the tears fall. 

Exhaling out, he felt himself nod in resignation to his fate. 

“Yes,” he whispered, as fresh tears sprung to his eyes. 

Harry smiled as his eyes glistened. Louis vaguely heard the sound of their parents clapping. Standing, he took Louis’ face in his hands. Louis felt sick, knowing that this was nothing like what he wanted their first kiss to be like. He closed his eyes and imagined himself standing somewhere else. 

He imagined that evening on the balcony, before Harry had shown his true colours. He imagined Harry, sitting close to him in the garden, beneath the weeping willow. He mourned for his dreams, as he felt Harry’s lips brush against his own. 

He stepped backwards, as if burnt, and he saw Harry’s face fall. 

“We are so happy with this decision!” Queen Anne exclaimed, coming to greet Louis more personally. “You are crying tears of joy, and I hope that these are the only tears that will come from this union.” 

It was only then that Louis realised that his face was streaked with tears. His head felt hot and his chest twisted. He wondered if this was what it felt like to have his heart broken. 

“I need to be excused,” he mumbled. He felt himself bow to his future in-laws before stumbling out of the room. He gasped for air as he walked quickly down the hallway. 

“Louis!” he heard Harry call. He began walking faster, only to hear Harry begin to run after him. 

“Wait-” Harry said. 

“No!” Louis interjected. “Please, just leave me alone.”

“Aren’t you happy, Louis?” Harry asked, confusion causing him to frown. He reached for Louis’ hands before dropping them at his side, his movements unsure. 

“Am I supposed to be happy that I’m your second choice? Or maybe your third? Or your fourth?” Louis asked, his voice shaking with rising anger. He could see Harry start to explain, and he wanted none of it. "Did you feel the bond with them too? Did you touch them, just to see if they have what we…” Louis’ voice faltered, as a fresh round of tears sprung up. “... if they have what we have?” 

Harry’s face fell as he took a step back from Louis. “Did you read my letter?” he asked, staring at the floor. 

“The one you sent me after you went on holiday with Kendall?” 

“Please tell me you read my letter,” Harry pleaded, his voice thick. 

Louis glanced up, wondering what reason Harry would have to cry. 

“No,” he stated. “I threw it in the fire.” 

Harry nodded as he inhaled sharply. “Right. So you just believe everything you see in the papers?” 

“Those photographs of the two of you spoke volumes,” Louis replied, his voice hollow. 

“I thought you knew me better than that,” Harry said, forlornly.

Louis shook his head as he began walking away from him. “I thought I did too.” 

As he started turning the corner to bring him back to his quarters, he heard Harry’s voice. This time, it was louder with a desperate edge to it that he had never heard before.

“Regardless of your feelings about our union, you are my omega,” Harry said, his eyes shining with tears despite the defiant set of his jaw. 

Louis fought the urge to roll his eyes. “Of course,” he replied before adding, with as much coldness in his voice that he could muster, “Your Majesty.” 

\--

Before Louis knew it, their wedding day had arrived. Between suit-fittings and cake tastings, being sat down with stuffy royal advisors to learn the official rules of being a member of the Royal Family, and even more etiquette training, Louis had hardly spent any time with Harry. 

Not that he minded. The alpha seemed to be able to occupy his time just fine, if the newspapers were correct.

_Partying Prince Soaking Up Last Days of Bachelorhood…. A Regal Disaster: Crown Prince Stumbles Home with Pals…. the Man Who Would Be King is still the Boy Who’d Rather Carouse.?_

The press had not spared Louis either. Their concerns over his opinions of Harry’s lifestyle were just thinly veiled jabs at his ego. Poor Louis, sitting at home, watching his fiancé gallivant through town without him. Naive Louis, thinking he could change him with his love. Desperate Louis, willing to sacrifice his dignity in order for a spot in the Royal Family. 

He wanted nothing to do with Harry, and it was wearing on his soul. He was to be married to him in a matter of hours, but instead of daydreaming of his handsome prince, he was trying to think of ways to escape to another country and change his identity. Perhaps he could sell the ring and use the money to live the rest of his days at sea, drifting from island to island, free from the burden of being married to someone who didn’t love him. 

He sighed. 

“Stop being dramatic,” he mumbled, staring at himself in the mirror. He could barely recognise himself underneath all of the regalia. Atop his head sat a crown, a swirl of diamonds and gold. His eyes were lined in a pale rose gold, bringing out the clear blue of his eyes. Ivory lace covered his arms and torso, while a satin cumberbund highlighted his waist. His trousers were deep blue, and as he walked nervously throughout his room, his slightly heeled shoes clicked against the floor. 

A knock at the door disrupted his thoughts.

“My Lord?” Niall called. 

“Yes, Niall, come in,” Louis replied. 

Niall entered, followed by Zayn, one of the footmen. In their arms, they held Louis’ wedding cape, a spectacle of nearly three metres of cream velvet and taffeta. 

“Could you have chosen a heavier cape, my Lord?” Zayn asked, an exasperated smile on his face. Beside him, Niall hung the cape from the highest point of the cupboard. The fabric draped down and across the floor. 

“If I am to be married to someone I could not care less about, I would like to at least look amazing,” Louis explained, shrugging one shoulder.

“‘Could not care less about,’ pfft,” Niall muttered. “That’s not true.”

“It is!” Louis replied. Knowing that Niall and Zayn have both witnessed him ripping up newspapers and quickly wiping away tears, he added, “It has to be.” 

Zayn placed his hands on Louis shoulders, a kind smile on his face. “Let us help you show him that you are the most beautiful omega he will ever know.” 

Feeling a lump rise in his throat at his friend’s show of affection, he nodded. Moments later, Louis stood in the mirror, his two lifelong friends at his side. Because the Royal Family had their own staff, they would not be able to follow him on his next chapter. The thought of it filled his eyes with tears. 

“My Lord?” Niall asked, reaching for his hand. 

“I don’t want to marry him, I don’t want to leave,” Louis cried. 

Zayn held his hand, his own eyes misty. “I am sorry you must do this,” he said. “But I know that you are strong.”

“And Harry will treat you well,” Niall added, before his face darkened. “But if he doesn’t…”

“We will be there,” Zayn completed his sentence. 

Louis laughed weepily, uncaring if his face was blotchy. He knew that his face would be captured on cameras before being broadcast across the world, that hundreds of thousands of people would be attentively following the royal wedding, but in this moment, he was just Louis. Just a boy, terrified and sad. 

But he knew he was also a boy who was tough and sure of who he was. He stood up straighter, the diamonds of his crown reflected brightly in the mirror. Whatever came next, he was ready. 

—

Throughout the ceremony, Louis could barely concentrate on anything except controlling his own nerves and looking anywhere but at Harry.

Harry had held his hands like he was breakable, which Louis realised was not far from the truth. Louis tried not to stare at his mother’s joyous smile, the hope in her eyes so much brighter than Louis’ own would ever be. He tried not to look at his groom’s face, which smiled shyly at Louis at every chance. He tried not to shiver at the touch of his pinky finger brushing lightly against the back of his hand as the Archbishop droned on and on. 

_(Years down the road, Louis would finally let himself cry tears of joy as he remembered Harry’s stunned face, the way he smiled with tears in his eyes as Louis walked down the aisle.)_

No, throughout the ceremony, Louis felt like he was one second away from falling apart. 

When it came time for them to kiss, Louis finally met Harry’s steady gaze. His green eyes softened as he smiled, stepping closer to Louis. 

“May I?” Harry asked. 

In that moment, all Louis wanted to think of was the Harry that he knew, the boy who gave him flowers and held his hand beneath the shade of the tulip trees. 

He nodded. 

Slowly, Harry leaned down until his lips were a breath away. As their noses brushed, Louis let his eyes fall closed. As he felt Harry’s lips upon his, he felt a sunshine-like warmth spread through him, as if his omega knew that its mate was truly there. Their lips slotted together as if they were meant to, and Louis wondered if it would be okay to pass the rest of the ceremony like this. He could feel himself smile against Harry’s lips, and when he opened his eyes, Harry was grinning at him with mirth. 

And, not for the first time, he felt breathless. 

“I’m so happy,” Harry whispered. Louis ducked his head in an attempt to hide his smile. With Harry smiling at him like that, he let himself feel a flicker of hope that maybe they would be okay. 

\--

The thing with flickers of hope is that they are short-lived. 

If Louis had it his way, he would have wanted a small wedding, just his friends and family in a small chapel and the sound of violins filling the air. He would never have envisioned leaving the abbey surrounded by security guards, a barricade barely holding back the paparazzi and the reporters. 

“Louis! How do you feel now that you’re married?”

“Your Highness, are you happy with your omega?”

“Prince Louis, what do you think about Harry and his other omegas?”

His blood ran cold. 

He stopped and turned, despite Harry’s hand on his arm, urging him to keep walking. 

“Excuse me?” Louis asked. 

“Our Prince was seen celebrating his last moments as a bachelor with a group of o-”

“Louis, don’t listen to him-” Harry pleaded, pulling on Louis arm. Louis promptly tore it away from his grasp. 

Despite his heart twisting in his chest, he held his head high. “Those other omegas are not the one standing here now though,” he said coldly. “Good day, sir.”

He continued walking and, for the sake of his own dignity, he allowed Harry to hold his hand. He waved and smiled at the throngs of people lining the streets. Many held up signs and bouquets of flowers, an offering of well-wishes to their new prince. He fought back the lump in his throat at their kindness, and he wondered if their love would be enough to sustain him through a lifetime of those types of questions. 

He didn’t have Harry’s love, it seemed. 

Once they were in their limousine, he dropped his smile along with Harry’s hand.

“Lou?” Harry asked with trepidation. 

“Is it true?” Louis asked, staring straight ahead. 

“No, love, I promise,” the Crown Prince replied. Louis looked at his new husband, who was sitting close to him, his hands open and reaching. 

“Why don’t I believe you?” Louis asked. The crown atop his head felt heavy, and he just wanted to take it all off and sleep. He could feel his eyes well with tears as he recalled all the headlines that seemed to taunt him. His heart broke as he felt the warmth from their kiss fade. “After all, it wouldn’t be the first time.” 

“I’ve never done anything! I would never do that to you!” Harry cried. 

“So I just imagined those photographs of you and Miss Jenner on the yacht? Or the ones of you and her dancing the night away? Do you purposely like to seek out the company of omegas for their friendship?” Louis rattled on, his voice breaking.

“They are my friends,” Harry said weakly. “The press… they’ve always had it out for me.” 

Louis snorted as his sadness tinged bitter. “Right. Because it’s in their best interest to sabotage the country’s darling prince.”

Harry’s jaw clenched, as frustration seeped into his voice. “I know you think you know everything, but you don’t. There is more at play here, and-”

“Spare me, Harry. I know everything I need to know,” Louis shot back as he crossed his arms over his chest. From the corner of his eye, he could see Harry reach for him, his hands shaking with hesitation. He snapped his head to stare at him when he felt Harry’s hand on his own. 

“Please, Louis,” Harry murmured. His eyes searched Louis’ pleadingly. “It’s our wedding day. I don’t want to fight.”

Louis’ eyes filled again, as he remembered that his dream of marrying someone he loved was now gone. He was married to Harry instead- Harry, a man he thought he knew. Harry, who betrayed him. 

“I know,” he replied, blinking his tears away before looking out the window. “Don’t worry. I’ll be your dutiful omega. I’ll smile and dance and kiss you when others are looking. I won’t let you down.”

“That’s not what-”

Louis squeezed his temples as the words poured out. “I don’t want to talk right now. I know you only chose me because the omegas you really want aren’t suitable for a royal title, but can we just?-” he sighed, suddenly incredibly tired. “I just want…”

_(He just wanted that feeling he had when they kissed. It was all of their hours together, soft smiles and whispered jokes, sunshine streaming on their face, letters read in haste. It was Harry, shyly brushing his fingers against Louis' arm when they sat next to each other in the garden. It was Louis trying not to smile when Harry pulled funny faces during formal events. It was the feeling of calm that passed through him when he felt Harry's skin against his own. He just wanted that, crown or no crown.)_

“That’s not…” Harry started before his voice died. “Yes,” He mumbled, as he stared down at his hands, his own eyes rimmed red. “Of course.”

\--

Louis fell asleep that night, weary and cold. Harry slept fitfully just an arm’s reach away, yet loneliness seemed to settle deep in his bones. There must be some other word to describe what Louis was feeling- "loneliness" didn't seem to capture it fully. The feeling that the person he once held so closely to his heart- his friend, the holder of his hopes and dreams- had actually turned out to be someone completely different was more than just loneliness. It was heartbreak, over and over again. 

Recalling how they dropped each others’ hands as soon as they were alone, how Harry’s smile had faded into a thin line as they walked towards their suite, how they undressed facing away from each other, how they fell to bed without any words…

Louis wondered if that loneliness was there to stay.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning, again, there is some nonconsensual alpha behaviour in this chapter- essentially, Louis goes to a bar, an alpha gets handsy, and Louis feels threatened. I've put **** before the scene escalates. You can just skip to the next set of **** to find the end of the scene.

Louis didn’t know when he began to think of the palace as his home. 

He tried to resist it, but over the past three months of their marriage, its charm won him over. He loved walking through the corridors in the morning when the chandeliers refracted the sunlight, casting rainbows on every surface. He loved lounging on the velvet chaise in the library, falling asleep to the smell of old books and a record playing quietly. He loved the kind staff who had welcomed him with open arms. 

It wasn’t just the palace though. 

Harry had been trying. 

Sometimes, they would be at boring functions and some inane comment would come from someone’s mouth. Their eyes would meet and they would have to turn away to avoid bursting into giggles. Louis realised that Harry always left a glass of water for him by the bed and that he always kept fresh flowers in Louis’ sitting room. Some days, they would lay in bed and read their books quietly, the silence comfortable rather than awkward. In those moments, Louis felt like they were just Harry and Louis instead of the Prince and Prince Consort. 

They still barely talked to each other. Harry often left early to attend to his duties, while Louis kept himself busy by diving into philanthropic work with the nearby orphanage. Some nights, Harry would not return until past midnight. Sometimes he smelled just of himself, but sometimes it was mixed with others. Betas. Alphas. Omegas. Louis reasoned it was because he was a busy man, always surrounded by others. He tried not to think about it, though it nagged at his heart. He tried not to notice how he missed Harry’s warmth on the other side of the bed those nights, how he’d bury his face in his pillow just to feel the comfort of the alpha’s scent. He tried not to notice anything he felt about his husband. 

Louis was at a precipice, and he knew that if let himself take even just the smallest step, he would stumble over the edge and fall. 

Louis walked into his sitting room one day to find a vase of sunflowers. When they were younger, Louis had told him that sunflowers were his favourite. Knowing that Harry had given them to Louis set off something odd in his gut. It felt like he was at war within himself, conflicted between gratitude and resentment that Harry seemed to know him at all. 

“I don’t want this,” Louis declared, barging into Harry’s study, vase in hand. 

“What are you talking about?” Harry asked from his place at his study desk. He glanced between Louis’ face and the vase of flowers in his hands. 

“The flowers! I don’t want them!” Louis explained. “You keep giving me flowers, and I don’t want them!”

Harry stood and smiled weakly at Louis. “I thought you’d like them.”

“Well, I don’t. Stop giving me things.”

Harry’s brow furrowed. Puzzled, he said, “But I want to- you’re my omega-” 

Those words erupted a storm of anger inside of Louis. He remembered the days when he had wanted nothing more than to be Harry’s omega, to be his only… but every day he was faced with reminders that he was just one among many. Harry had some nerve trying to stake a claim on him.

“Maybe legally, but I am not your omega,” he interjected, his voice strained with frustration. 

“When will you accept that we’re married?” Harry asked as he gestured towards the rings on their fingers, his voice mirroring Louis’ own irritation.

“I never asked for this, I never wanted you-”

“That is a lie, and you know it,” Harry shook his head, as he pointed his finger at Louis. 

“Of course you would assume that I was like every other omega, just ready to fall down and present myself to you!”

“No, I assumed that you were the Louis I knew!” Harry shouted in exasperation. 

“You don’t know me at all!” Louis cried, trying to forget those moments in the garden. The sadness he felt every time Harry smelled like anyone else burst forth over the wall he had been trying to build. “You think I’m happy just sitting here each night while you’re off with another omega? While the whole country pities me and thinks I’m a fool for staying with you?”

“When will you realise that I am your alpha and you are my omega?” Harry roared, slamming his hand on his desk. The sudden noise startled Louis, and he dropped the vase to the ground. Backing away from Harry, he whined lowly in fear. He gave into the instinct to bow his head and exhaled shakily as he stared at the floor.

“Lou, I didn’t mean to yell, I would never-” Harry faltered. “I just meant to say that I’m your alpha, and-”

“I heard you,” Louis interrupted, finally raising his head to meet Harry’s tearful gaze. The sight of the sunflowers strewn amongst the broken glass shattered whatever hope he had for their marriage. He set his jaw determinedly. “Do not raise your voice at me- I am _not _your omega. I don’t care if you’re the bloody King of England— This is not the marriage I wanted.”

He began to walk out of the study, feeling like his legs might collapse. Shame began to overwhelm his omega, and he had to fight urges to turn around and reunite with the alpha.

“Louis, wait, you’ve misunderstood,” Harry pleaded, his voice shaky as he walked towards the door. 

Louis held out his arm to stop him. “I understand just fine. The whole world may think you are my alpha, but you will never be.” 

Harry recoiled as if slapped. Blinking back tears, he shook his head. “Won’t you just give me a chance? Give us a chance?”

Images of the two of them, their smiles pressed together in a kiss, flashed through Louis’ mind. The sounds of their pups running through the rainbowed corridors, jumping into bed on lazy Sunday mornings… Louis’ heart yearned for that, and at one point, he had yearned for Harry. 

It would be so easy to fall. 

But then Louis thought about the way Harry would fall into bed, still smelling like another omega, or the way he had been photographed so carelessly with his arms around Kendall. Harry had vowed that he had never betrayed Louis, but how could he believe him? 

“Harry, I…” Louis whimpered. “I can’t.” 

Harry nodded, inhaling sharply as he looked away. “All because of some photographs in a newspaper?”

Louis looked down, his own tears belying his attempts to appear strong. 

“I thought you knew me,” Harry said quietly as he sunk into his chair. 

Louis’ chest tightened as he turned away from Harry. He began walking back towards his sitting room, his hands grasping at the walls. He feared he would collapse otherwise. 

\-- 

“Are you sure this is the right place, your Highness?” Paul, the palace driver asked, his tone careful though polite. They were parked outside of a jazz lounge catering to alphas and unmated omegas. The sparkling lights were bright and alluring, and they could almost compete with the feeling of Harry’s smile. 

Louis didn’t want to think about Harry though. 

“Yes, Paul. I’ll only be a short while,” Louis said as he buttoned his coat, covering up a thin jumper and tight trousers. It was more casual and much more revealing than what he typically wore, but it would help him on his mission tonight. Harry was busy with royal duties, and Louis wanted to know what it was like. What did Harry feel when he was with others? Did he charm others as easily as he had charmed Louis? 

Louis had followed his etiquette perfectly. Aside from their kiss on their wedding day, Louis had never kissed another alpha. His wanton display at the ball when he was in heat was the closest he ever came to being with an alpha in any way. Harry was the only one who had ever gotten close enough to Louis to make him blush, to know his scent. 

How unfair it would be for Louis to miss out on what Harry had been enjoying all along. 

With hesitation in his eyes, Paul nodded. “Of course, your Highness.” 

A moment later, Paul opened the door and held out a hand to assist Louis from the limousine. 

“Would you like me to accompany you?” he asked. 

Louis waved his hand dismissively. “No, thank you.”

Paul seemed reluctant to go, but Louis’ position as the Duke of Cheshire made it impossible for him to disobey. He began to walk towards the entrance. 

“Oh, and Paul?” Louis called, turning over his shoulder. “Please use discretion regarding this trip. I’m here on personal matters and wouldn’t want to worry anyone.” 

Paul gave a tightlipped smile. “Yes, your Highness.”

Louis entered the club, hoping that his more revealingly casual outfit and mussed hair, along with his scent neutralizers, would sufficiently disguise him. He hoped the sprays were enough to hide Harry’s scent. He didn’t want to break his marriage vows. His only intention for this adventure was to feel what it was like to live freely. To feel wanted… chosen… by an alpha. 

He had been good his entire life, and for what? Awkward silences and sleeping alone in a cold bed? 

Harry had taken to sleeping in his study since what Louis liked to call the Sunflower Incident. He no longer left Louis small gifts or sat with him for the occasional afternoon tea. They barely saw each other, let alone spoke to each other. Of course, for official events, they behaved civilly. Louis tried to ignore the pull he felt each time he was near his husband. He tried to keep his eyes from burning with tears every time they held hands in public or had to smile and act besotted with each other. 

The niggling fear that Harry had only chosen him because his first choice was unavailable festered in his heart. He had taken to staring at himself in the mirror, slowly picking himself apart. If he was only beautiful like her, or if he wasn’t so uptight and shy, would Harry have felt the need to seek out her company? If he was more open with his affections when they were younger instead of following the proper omega etiquette of prudishly shying away from anything more than the occasional hand-holding, would Harry be satisfied with him?

Spurred on by his feelings of defectiveness, he was determined to feel wanted. 

He took a seat at the bar, nervously squeezing his hands. He ordered water from the beta bartender and tried to relax. He wanted to be like those carefree and fun omegas that Harry seemed to like so much. 

“I don’t think I’ve seen you here before,” a low voice murmured from behind him. He tried to school his features into a warm and inviting smile before spinning around. The alpha was tall with blue eyes, his blonde hair swept back over his head. 

“It’s my first time here,” Louis replied, trying to sound as coy as possible. “Do you have any cocktail suggestions?” 

The man sat down and slid a menu towards him. “The bartenders make a decent French 75. Do you like gin?”

Louis had never tried it, but he grinned in an attempt to appear game. “I love it.”

The man waved the bartender over and ordered two of the cocktails. “So,” the man asked, “what’s a sweet omega like you doing here?”

Louis fought the urge to roll his eyes at the alpha’s poor attempt at talking him up. He sipped the surprisingly delicious drink. “Just wanted a night out,” he answered, licking the gin from his lips. He gulped another sip nervously when he saw the alpha’s eyes darken. 

“Has anyone ever told you that you look like the Prince’s husband?” the alpha asked, his head cocked to the side. 

Louis shook his head. “That’s a first,” he said weakly. He had never been good at lying. 

“He’s a beautiful omega,” the alpha said, his eyes wandering up and down Louis' body. “If I was the Prince, I would never let him out of my sight.” 

Louis tried to tamp down the nervousness he felt in his gut when he realised that he was well and truly on his own, in a nightclub, without a bodyguard. 

Without his alpha. 

**** 

“I don’t have an alpha to tie me down,” he shrugged coquettishly. 

“No?” the alpha murmured, leaning in closer. “I could be that for you.” 

The man’s eyes darkened as he placed a hand on Louis’ thigh. At this stranger’s touch, Louis’ inner omega winced and howled. It all felt wrong. He wasn’t Harry. He was an alpha that wanted him, yes, but he wasn’t his alpha. 

Repulsed, Louis stood suddenly, turning towards the door. “I’m sorry, I need to go.”

The man stood and tried to grab his arm before moving to stand in front of him, blocking him from the exit. HIs smile looked less flirty and more menacing as the seconds ticked by. “C’mon, sweetheart, don’t go yet.”

Louis tried to step to the side but the alpha just moved along with him. His breath quickened as the pit in his stomach grew. “Thank you for the drink, but I can’t- I need to go.” 

“Back to your Prince?” the alpha smirked. Louis’ blood froze, and he was filled with shame. What was he doing here? 

Louis shook his head as he fishmouthed for words. 

“What’s the matter, your Highness? He’s not treating you right? I bet his royal knot can’t keep you satisfied,” the alpha continued, before stepping forward and grabbing onto Louis’ hips. “Not like mine could.”

Louis felt stuck, as he felt his face burn with shame. He turned his face away and looked at the ground, his eyes burning with the threat of tears. “Let me go,” he whimpered. “I don’t want you.” 

“But I want you,” the alpha muttered, his grip tightening. 

“I recommend that you drop your hands and back away,” a cold voice demanded. Louis looked up, as relief soared through his heart. Behind the man stood Harry, his eyes blazing with anger. 

The alpha’s eyes widened and he finally loosened his grip. Louis took the opportunity to run behind Harry, who put out his hand for him to grab. He could vaguely hear the blonde alpha apologising, with his head down in subservience. But his mind was more occupied with the sense of safety that encompassed him when he felt Harry’s hand grasp his, his scent familiar and soothing. He felt his knees weaken as he buried his face in Harry's back, gasping in between sobs.

****

“Louis,” Harry said, turning towards him when the bartenders had a hold on the alpha. “let’s go home.” 

Louis looked up as tears rolled down his face. Shaking his head, he stared at the ground. “Harry, I don’t know what I was doing, I-”

“Shh,” Harry said, clutching him close. His voice was surprisingly shaky as he whispered in Louis’ ear. “Talk later. Let’s just go home, omega.”


	5. Chapter 5

On the car ride to the palace, all Louis wanted was to crawl into their bed. He wanted Harry beside him, reading his books, the sound of the rustling pages like a reassurance that he was safe. He wanted to breathe in his scent, smoky and sweet, as he fell asleep. 

He didn’t know if he would ever have that chance. After all, he had tried to flirt with another alpha. He hadn’t wanted to actually cheat, no, but he had disregarded his vows anyway. Regardless of Harry’s past actions, Louis felt worn down by his guilt. His body shook with the leftover adrenaline from the near-assault, and he curled into himself as he stared out the window. 

Harry sat silently beside him, his hands clenched into fists as they dug into his thighs. Louis could feel the weight of his stare, and he finally looked at him. 

Harry looked away quickly, before rubbing his tear-stained face. 

“Are you happy, Louis?” he asked after a few moments, his voice quiet and sad. 

Louis fumbled for words, unsure of what Harry was asking. Did he want to know if he was happy with his decisions? If he was happy, in general? Unsure, Louis settled on replying, “I’m not happy with my actions, no.” 

Harry shook his head before glancing at Louis again. “No, I mean-are you happy? Are you happy with me?” 

Louis’ first instinct from years of omega training was to reassure his alpha. He was about to say “Yes, of course,” but the words died on his lips. 

“Harry, I think you know the answer,” he mumbled after a pause.

Harry buried his face in his hands, and with a shock, Louis realised that he was crying. This was unfamiliar territory- the part of him that festered in bitterness and betrayal wanted to turn away in self-satisfaction. But the part of him that lived in daydreams of their moments from boyhood wanted to reach out and comfort him. Which part was Louis going to listen to?

He placed a hand on his shaking shoulder. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Harry, I’m so sorry.” 

“Don’t be. If I only...” Harry said, sitting up suddenly, his face solemn. He scrubbed it again with his hands. Wincing as tears filled his eyes again. “If I made you happy.”

_(Louis thought of the peace he felt when they sat together, or when their eyes would meet from across the room. He thought of the way his laugh had traveled through the garden when he listened to Harry’s stories, of the gentle way Harry would hold his hand during public events. He never dared to think of this as happiness, but-)_

Louis opened his mouth to speak. Harry laughed weakly as he shrugged his shoulders. 

“I haven’t done a good job explaining anything,” Harry sighed. “I sent you a letter, but…”

Louis thought back to the way he rashly threw the letter into the fire, how he watched it burn with bitterness. He never thought about what it might have said. His voice was hoarse as he asked, “What did it say?” 

Harry exhaled slowly. “When I was fourteen, I met the person that I wanted to be with. I knew from the moment we met… I told my parents.”

Louis wondered what this all had to do with him. He looked over at Harry to find Harry already smiling sadly at him. 

“They were happy with my decision. They were surprised I was so sure of myself, as young as I was, but they trusted my judgement,” Harry said. “I knew from such an early age, so I didn’t think spending time with others was a big deal. To me, it was like I was just biding my time until I could be with my person. And the royal PR team said it would be good publicity. They said that nobody cares about a boring prince who found the love of his life at fourteen.”

Louis wondered who this person was. They obviously held his heart captive, even after all these years. 

“It doesn’t feel like my story to tell, but after everything, I feel like you deserve to know,” Harry continued after a long pause. 

“What is it?” he asked, his brow furrowed. The anxiety in his stomach grew, as he imagined the potential bombshells Harry could drop. 

“Kendall and I met shortly before I met you, and we became good friends,” he began. Louis inhaled sharply as he felt his heart sink. The small flicker of hope he had for their relationship extinguished to darkness. Harry reached for his hand, as if he could sense that Louis was slipping away. 

“She told me that she didn’t like alphas. She was under a lot of pressure to find an alpha, and I told her that I’d help her out, so that she wouldn’t have to date other alphas. It was stupid of me,” Harry explained quickly, his hands clutching onto Louis’. “It was so stupid because I ended up hurting you. The person I love.”

Louis whipped his head to stare at the alpha. “What?” he asked, his breath caught in his chest. 

“Those photographs of Kendall and me-- they were just paparazzi shots to appease her parents. It all felt wrong,” Harry said. He rubbed his thumb over the back of Louis’ hand. “Because it wasn’t you, Louis… you’re my omega. I knew it from the moment I met you.” 

Louis felt his lip quiver as tears filled his eyes. His heart began to race even as his mind was slowly piecing Harry’s words together. “But this whole time, I thought I was just your second choice, I thought you didn’t actually want me-”

“You’re all I want, Lou,” Harry interrupted, putting his hand on Louis’ cheek. “I’ve been trying to show you that, but it just ended up pushing you away.”

Louis recalled their fight when Harry had shouted that he was his omega, and he was able to see his emotions for what they really were. Harry hadn’t been angry with him at all. 

“Every time you told me that I was your omega…” he whispered, turning his nose to nuzzle at Harry’s hand. “Harry, I’m sorry.” 

Harry shifted closer even as he dropped his hand to his lap. “I know this isn’t the life you wanted. I thought we would be happy together, but you’re not happy. Lou… it breaks my heart that you’re not.”

Louis wanted to interrupt him, tell him that he was happy, but the words failed to come out. Was he happy? Yes, there were moments, glimmers of what could be. And even though he knew the truth about those photographs, the sting of being the pitied fool of England still smarted. He wondered why Harry still would come to bed smelling like someone else, why he’d let the world continue to think that he was the hopeless omega who let his husband cheat on him. 

His resentment felt like an impossible mountain to climb. He believed that Harry loved him, and part of him knew that he loved him back. But his feelings felt muddled by the pain. 

“I could be happy,” Louis murmured. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted. But… Harry, I don’t know.” 

Harry nodded as big tears streaked his face once more. Louis grasped for his hands, an echo of Harry’s actions just moments earlier. “I want this… I want us. It just hurts so much,” he explained, his voice cracking as the pain rose to the surface. “If you love me, and I’m your omega, why would you let them say those things about me? Who do you spend your nights with, when you come home and smell like someone else?”

“I haven’t been a good alpha to you, I know. When you shut me out, I just felt lonely, and I-” Harry began. Louis felt like he might be sick and began to shake his head, not wanting to know the rest of Harry’s sentence. 

“I’ve never done anything. Ever. I swear. I would never do anything. I want all of my firsts to be with you,” Harry said, squeezing Louis’ hands almost like he was pleading for Louis to stay with him. “I have a lot of friends. Yes, some of them are omegas. But they’re not my omega. They’re not you.”

Louis wanted to let himself stumble off the edge, fall headfirst into loving Harry. But part of him was so unsure that Harry would be there to catch him. He still felt trapped behind a wall, Harry just on the other side, and no matter what Harry said or did, he knew that he would have to be the one to break down that fort. 

His heart still felt like it needed protecting, and until it felt safe, it would hide behind its defences.

Exhaustion set into his bones as he realised that they would not come to a happy resolution to their conversation. He shrugged, feeling helpless to his feelings. If he could, he would erase everything about the last few months. He would go back to the start, before that moment when he forgot about the Harry that he knew and bought into the Harry that the papers were trying to sell him. It all felt so hopeless. His chest ached as he realised what he needed to do, if they were to ever have a chance.

“I think I need to move home,” he whispered shakily. “I just need some time alone, away from all of this.” 

He could hear Harry choking back tears, his breath shaky as he cried. “It’s not that I don’t love you, because I do,” Louis' voice broke, “but all this time, I felt so angry. And I just want to get to know you without those voices in my head telling me that you’re only going to hurt me. I just wish we could go back.”

“Please, Louis, don’t,” Harry cried. “Don’t go. We can start over, together, I’m begging-”

Louis stared out the window, his eyes burning. He felt sick to his stomach as heartache seemed to drown him in its waves. “Harry, please. I need to.” 

The distance between them in the car felt cold, as the only sounds to be heard were of their muffled tears. The car pulled up to the palace, and Louis wiped his eyes quickly. In the foyer, Harry reached for Louis’ arm. 

“I just want you to know that I understand,” Harry said. “Take your time. Just… I’ll be here for you. No matter what you decide.” 

Louis blinked back tears as the gravity of the situation began to weigh on him. He nodded before walking numbly to his room.


	6. Chapter 6

Louis wiggled his toes in the sand as he stared out over the azure waters. Laying down against his warm beach towel, he let the sun dry the beads of water that remained on his bare torso. The laughter of the children frolicking on the shore, along with the gentle breaking of the waves, were the only sounds around him. 

Within his mind, however… 

His mind drifted to Harry. Always Harry. 

Here he was, on the most beautiful beach he had ever seen, and his mind was 8000 kilometres away in dreary England, thinking of a man he hadn’t seen in nearly three months. Wistfully smiling, Louis realised their separation was almost longer than their actual marriage. 

His first stop after leaving the Royal Palace was to his parents’ estate. With his head low, he explained the difficulties that they had been facing. Despite his parents’ scandalised pleas to return to Harry and make it work, he gently told them that he planned on moving in with Niall for a bit. 

Niall, unlike his parents, welcomed him with open arms and a spare bed to sleep on. He listened while Louis spilled out the pages of his conflicted heart, offering no advice but a gentle shoulder to cry on. Louis knew he could stay there indefinitely, but he didn’t want to take advantage of Niall’s kindness. Within a week, he had booked a flight to travel out of England. When he was younger, he was taught that omegas shouldn’t travel alone, that their role was in the home to serve their alpha and take care of their pups. But he had always wanted to see the world, to make his own memories instead of living vicariously through others. Bucking against the confines of society, and with a pit in his stomach, he boarded a plane to Australia. 

From there, he traveled to different countries in Asia- the Philippines, Thailand, India- before traveling down towards Kenya and Tanzania. On his way to North America, he stopped in Morocco before flying across the Atlantic. He spent time in New York City before flying over to Los Angeles. Afterwards, he traveled down towards Mexico City before flying south towards Argentina and Brazil. He was going to fly home to finally face Harry before his fears got the worst of him, and he decided to make one more stop before heading to England. 

Which is how he ended up thinking of Harry on a Costa Rican paradise. 

He had written to Harry throughout his travels, just brief updates to let him know that he was safe. He had told Harry not to write back, since he wouldn’t be in one place for too long. They hadn't even spoken on the telephone. He had asked for time and space, and Harry had given him what he wanted. Regardless of their separation, Louis didn’t want his husband to worry about him. His omega’s yearning was like an itch beneath the surface of his skin, wondering why his alpha was so far away. He could only imagine that Harry felt the same. 

When he felt like his skin was starting to burn, he returned to his hotel. A pile of newspapers were placed on the concierge desk. He had tried to avoid the news, which had been a plague on his heart for what seemed like ages, but today, his eyes flitted down briefly. With a start, he did a double-take at the photograph splashed across the front page. It was Harry, at some formal function. 

“Forlorn Prince Lost Without His Mate?”

The article talked about how Harry has taken to hours-long walks through the countryside. The journalist made sure to point out that Harry looked miserable all the time now, his eyes dark and face gaunt with sadness. When the journalist had asked him about his marriage, Harry had replied, “Louis is pursuing his dream of traveling.” When the journalist dug further about how he felt about it, he had answered, “Of course I miss him- he is half of me. But, I feel his happiness as my own, so if he is happy, then so am I.” 

Louis slowly let the paper fall to the desk as he contemplated Harry’s words. He had gone all over the world to gain some perspective on his marriage, and despite all the splendour of the world and all of the beauty he had witnessed, he realised that it all felt muted. Colours weren't nearly as vibrant, pale watery tones instead of the blinding rainbows that painted his heart whenever he was with Harry. 

If Louis stayed still for long enough, he could almost feel his inner wolf trying to escape from his chains and drag him home. Each time he felt that tug, he packed his bags and went to a different locale, hoping that he would feel something- anything- to prove to himself that he had made the right choice. That pushing Harry away was for his own benefit, that he only cared for Harry because he was forced into marriage with him… that, in his absence, Harry would only fail him again. 

Harry had hurt him, yes, but his heart had been true all along. Those photos with the other omega were not taken in a moment of lascivious indiscretion. Louis understood that the alpha had merely been trying to be a good friend to Kendall. His head kept screaming that he had many reasons not to trust Harry, but his heart knew. His heart knew that the prince, beneath all the royal pretenses, was just Harry. 

“He is half of me,” Louis murmured, the image of Harry’s sad eyes burned to his memory. He had gone through every timezone to realign their marriage onto the right track, but perhaps all he needed was where he had started. 

That night, he sat down and wrote a letter. It would be the last one from his travels. 

_“Dear Harry,_

__

__

_I’m coming home._

__

__

_Lou.”_


	7. Chapter 7

Louis clambered out of the car as soon as it stopped in front of the palace doors. His heart raced with the idea of seeing Harry again. The long journey from Costa Rica gave him time to tear down his defenses from the inside. He was tired of being guarded by the walls he had built- he just wanted to be with his alpha, to let himself be loved the way he knew Harry loved him. 

His voice echoed in the marble-floored corridors as he called out for Harry. He burst through the doors of his study, only to find it empty. Rushing towards their bedroom, he called out for his alpha again. Their bedroom was dark, the curtains drawn closed. Dust settled over the bedside tables, and the air seemed stale. His chest twisting, Louis realised that Harry probably still slept in the study. 

He needed to find him. 

Remembering the newspaper article that spurred him to return home, he quickly found himself jogging out the back doors of the palace. The wind rushed through his hair as he began to run in earnest, his omega urging him on through the fields of green grass and wildflowers. After what seemed like an eternity, he spotted his alpha in the distance. 

He could feel his smile overtake his face, as he shouted, “Harry!” 

Harry froze and turned towards him, his own smile slowly emerging. They started running towards each other, and Louis could swear he heard symphonies in the distance. Maybe it was just the wind. 

_(In his heart, Louis liked to think that it was just what love sounded like in his head.)_

Suddenly, he found himself face to face with Harry. Whether it was the running or his alpha’s presence, Louis felt breathless. 

_(Louis knew that even if he had walked slowly, he would have felt breathless all the same. It was Harry-- He always made him breathless.)_

“Hi,” he said, suddenly shy. 

“Hi,” Harry replied. He hesitantly stepped closer to Louis, his fingertips brushing against the back of Louis’ hand. 

“Harry, I…” Louis faltered as he stared at the ground. His mind scrambled for words to say. What he felt seemed impossible to fit into words. He laced his hands in Harry’s, and as he felt the sense of calm run through him, he finally looked into Harry’s eyes. 

“I love you,” Louis said, tears springing to his eyes. He buried his face in Harry’s neck, finally breathing in his alpha’s scent. As he wound his arms around Harry’s back, he felt Harry hold him even tighter. 

“I love you too, Louis,” Harry murmured, brushing his lips against Louis forehead. His face softened as he lifted Louis’ chin. “Oh, my omega, don’t cry.”

Harry held his face tenderly in his hands. “I love you, Louis,” he repeated, just a mere breath between them. 

“I don’t want to fight this anymore,” Louis whispered, his eyes soft as he gazed at Harry. “I just want to be with you.”

Harry smiled. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted, Lou.”

“I don’t care about being a prince, that big palace, or anything, I just want you,” Louis continued. “Ever since we were kids, running through the gardens, all I would dream about was you.”

“Let me make your dreams come true,” Harry said, nuzzling his nose against Louis’. “Anything you want, I want it with you.” 

Louis brought his hands up to rest on Harry’s chest. “Do you remember when we were younger, and we’d just talk for hours?” he began. “It felt like a dream, those moments with you. I just want you, to fall asleep with you, and wake up next to you. I want to hold your hand at stupid balls and in the kitchen, I want our pups ruining the marble floors, and-“

He was interrupted from his reverie when Harry stepped away from him. Before he could feel even a moment of unease, he realised that Harry was on one knee.

Picking a wildflower from the grass, Harry held it up to Louis. 

“My beautiful omega, you are the one for me. I want a lifetime- a whole garden of memories- with you. More than the crown, more than all the world, you are my one treasure. I want to do this right, the way you deserve,” Harry said, his voice shaking with tenderness. “Will you marry me, Louis, and be my omega?” 

Louis smiled through his tears as he fell to his knees, throwing his arms around Harry. Covering his face with kisses, he laughed out a resounding “Yes!”

Quieter, he kissed Harry softly, their lips meeting in a smile.

“Yes,” he whispered again as he nodded fervently, kissing him once more.

Grinning widely, Harry leapt to his feet, his eyes lit up. 

“Let’s get married,” he exclaimed. 

“Right now?” Louis asked, as he stood and reached for his alpha’s hands.

“Yes! We’ll go to town, go to the first church we find!”

“But, Harry,” Louis said, slightly puzzled. “We’re already married.”

Harry brushes the fringe off Louis’ forehead before kissing his forehead. “I want to do it right this time. I want you to be happy when you say ‘I do.’”

Louis chuckled as the absurdity of getting married again settled in. “Okay,” he agreed. “Let’s go!”

And that is how Louis and Harry found themselves in a small chapel reciting their vows for a second time. The sunlight streamed through the stained glass windows, painting the floors and walls in brilliant colors— and yet, all they could see was each other. 

“I give you my body, that we two might be one. I give you my spirit, ‘til our life shall be done. You cannot possess me for I belong to myself, but while we both wish it, I give you that which is mine to give. You cannot command me, for I am a free person. But I shall serve you in those ways you require and the honeycomb will taste sweeter coming from my hand,” Louis murmured, reciting the solemn words from the worn pages held by the priest. Smiling, he waited for his alpha to recite his own vows. 

“I vow you the first cut of my meat, the first sip of my wine, from this day it shall only be your name I cry out in the night and into your eyes that I smile each morning; I shall be a shield for your back as you are for mine, not shall a grievous word be spoken about us, for our marriage is sacred between us and no stranger shall hear my grievance,” Harry spoke, his voice determined yet soft. “Above and beyond this, I will cherish and honor you through this life and into the next.” 

This time, when they kissed, Louis finally let himself fall, completely and utterly, in love. 

—

On their first wedding night, they slipped into bed under the cover of darkness, their eyes and hands averted from each other. They had fallen asleep with a canyon between them, their inner wolves howling to the moon in search of one another. 

On the night of their second wedding, Louis walked slowly to the foot of their bed, where Harry sat waiting for him. The setting sun cast shades of gold and rose across the room, and Louis felt like he had entered their collective heart. 

He stood between Harry’s legs, his hands clasped nervously in front of him. Reverently, Harry placed his hands on his hips and pulled him gently forward. 

“Lou,” he said, nuzzling his nose into Louis’ tummy. “What do you want? Anything, I’ll give you.”

Louis reached up and held onto Harry’s head, his fingers entwined in his curls. His eyes fell shut as he felt Harry kiss across his belly. “Everything,” he breathed. “I want everything with you, alpha.” 

Harry looked up at him, pupils widening with want. Tilting his head up, he pulled Louis down into a kiss. As the kiss deepened, Louis pushed Harry back onto the bed and crawled over him. 

“Omega,” Harry marveled as he bit back a smile.

Bashful again, Louis buried his face in his neck. “Harry, I don’t…” he mumbled. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Harry turned on his side to face his husband, brushing his hair off his face. “Hey, neither do I. We’ll learn together, okay?” 

Louis nodded before approaching Harry for another kiss. With their lips locked, Louis let his hands explore Harry’s chest and back, pulling him on top of him. A thrill rushed through his body as their cocks brushed. Moaning, he felt his body release slick, his scent floating through the air. 

“Smell so good,” Harry whispered, licking his neck. “God, baby, I-”

His words faltered as he grasped at Louis’ arse and grinded his hips deeper. Louis wasn’t even aware that he was pleading until Harry sat up and nodded. “I’ll take care of you, omega, don’t worry,” he said as he undid the buttons on his shirt and shoved his trousers out of the way. Louis quickly undressed too, throwing his shirt to the floor before wriggling out of his trousers and pants. 

Louis noticed Harry’s eyes darkening as they wandered over his bare body. With his ankle and calf, he pulled the alpha closer before letting his legs fall open. He grabbed a hold of Harry’s hand and placed it over his racing heart. 

“I love you,” he breathed. 

Harry smiled and rested on his elbows as he kissed Louis again and again, murmuring “I love you” like a prayer on repeat. As he slid inside, he let out a groan. “You feel so good,” he said, awe-struck, as Louis’ whimpers kept escaping from his slack-jawed mouth. Louis grasped at his back as Harry gave his own body over to his omega, his hips moving steadily. The sounds of their gasps and moans filled the room. Whatever he could do to produce this symphony, he would keep doing for the rest of his life. 

“My omega,” Harry said, breathless, as Louis moved above him moments later, his hips bouncing to the rhythm of a song that only they could hear. 

“My alpha,” Louis sighed, his hands resting on Harry’s chest as he worked his hips at a more feverish pace. “Please, I need you, I need your knot… I need your bite.” 

Sitting up, Harry continued to piston his hips up and down as Louis clung helplessly to him, his cries muffled as he mouthed at the alpha’s shoulder. Harry pulled out and turned Louis over, his alpha instincts taking over. Falling onto his elbows, Louis pushed his arse back towards Harry’s hips. 

“C’mon, Alpha,” he said, his eyes hazy. He felt wanton, the feeling foreign yet natural, with Harry with him. “Mate me.” 

Eagerly, Harry entered Louis again as he quickly built up to a feverish pace. He reached around to take hold of Louis’ cock, stroking in time with his thrusts. Louis reached back to pull Harry even closer, until Harry’s body covered his completely. His moans muffled by the pillow, he turned his face to gaze at Harry.

“So good,” he gasped. Harry kissed him sloppily, his thrusts becoming jagged. Louis could feel the base of the alpha’s cock grow and start catching on his hole. 

“Close,” Harry whimpered against Louis’ mouth. He nuzzled his nose into Louis’ neck, letting his teeth graze against his skin. 

“Yours,” Louis whispered, grasping at Harry’s hand that was holding up his body against the mattress. His heart raced with the feeling of his mate against him, inside him, everywhere. 

“Mine,” Harry repeated, his hand stroking Louis even faster. 

Louis’ cries went higher and higher until he came in a silent cry, his eyes squeezed shut as he held tightly onto his alpha. 

Harry followed closely behind as he sunk his teeth into Louis’ neck, his knot expanding fully. Louis could feel his senses heighten as their mating became complete, Harry’s scent mixing with his own to create something fully and only theirs. He could feel the peace within Harry’s beating heart, the high that he was still riding after his own orgasm. Collapsing, Harry turned them on their sides and wrapped his arms around the trembling omega. He kissed and licked the broken skin, admiring his work. 

“I’m yours, omega,” he breathed. “Beyond my dying breath.”

Louis kissed Harry’s forearms and turned his head to look at the alpha. 

“For the rest of this life and the next, I am yours,” Louis whispered, before he brought their lips together in a kiss. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i WISH I wrote those beautiful-ass vows, but alas, they are from https://www.minted.com/wedding-ideas/wedding-vows/traditional. They're the traditional Celtic vows.


	8. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little something from Harry’s POV. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! I'd love to hear your thoughts on my humble little fic. Thanks again to the mods of the fest <3

“Papa, look!” the little boy yelled, his bare feet pitter-pattering across the bare floors. He ran straight to Harry, who squatted down to pick him up. Launching him up in the air, the boy shrieked with glee before settling into the prince’s arms. 

“What do you have there, Alexander love?” Harry asked, eyeing the chain of flowers in the boy’s hands. 

“I make crown!” the toddler explained proudly, holding it up in front of Harry’s face. “Papa put on?”

Harry smiled before nuzzling Alexander’s nose. “D’you want me to wear it, or do you want to wear it?”

Alexander pondered his question for a bit before pointing to his father. “You wear.” 

Harry carefully placed the crown of daisies and mums over his head, his curls holding them in place. 

“How do I look?” he asked his baby. 

“Very beautiful,” Louis replied, leaning against the doorframe. He had a matching crown atop his own head, his cheeks rosy from being out in their sprawling gardens. 

Harry grinned, taking in the sight of his lovely omega. “Not as beautiful as you,” he said. “Alexander, isn’t your Dada the prettiest?”

The little boy nodded. “Yeah! Dada pretty.”

Louis rolled his eyes before wrapping his arm around the two of them. 

“The loves of my life,” he sighed contentedly, resting his head on Harry’s shoulder. He nuzzled his nose against his son’s, who proceeded to giggle. 

“Funny,” Alexander beamed before turning to Harry. “Papa nick?”

Harry’s brow furrowed as he tried to decipher what his two-year-old was saying. “Nick?” 

Louis was quicker to pick up on the toddler’s dialect. “He wants to know if you’re joining us on our picnic.” 

“Oh!” Harry replied. “Of course, darling. Did you know that your Dada and your Papa used to have picnics in the garden? Back when I was courting him?”

“You weren’t courting me, we were just friends,” Louis grinned. He took Harry’s hand and began walking back towards the French doors that led to their garden. 

Harry stopped him and kissed him firmly, even as Alexander tried to squirm out of his arms so he could run. 

“Oh, my omega,” he sighed. “I knew from the moment I saw you that you were the one for me.”

Louis bit back a smile. “Alexander, tell your papa to stop being such a sap.” 

“Papa sap!” the boy laughed, pulling on Harry’s hand as he pushed the doors open. 

“You love that I’m sappy for you,” Harry replied, breathing in his omega’s familiar scent. 

As Alexander ran off into the gardens to chase butterflies, his curly blonde hair flying behind him, Louis stopped and turned towards his alpha. “I do love it,” he admitted. “Look at all this.” 

He pointed at their country house garden, at the golden mid-day sun, the air fragrant with lavender and roses. “This is my dream come true,” he murmured. 

“It’s our dream come true,” Harry said, kissing Louis’ knuckles. Hand in hand, they walked down the path towards the apple tree, flowers growing all around.


End file.
